Tuesday, March 22, 2016


Yesterday in my post I used the phrase "holy guacamole," much to my surprise and despair. Today I will use another phrase I never use and that phrase is... Holy Toledo! It's so windy and so cloudy and about-to-be-so-rainy right now! And will be for the rest of today! And probably tomorrow! And please oh please, Meg, stop using exclamation marks! I mean, stop using exclamation marks. Period. Good. Deep breath.

That deep breath wasn't just words I typed. I really did take that deep breath because holy guacamole of Toledo I needed it. I feel great, don't get me wrong, but it's the kind of great that I felt on Sunday. The borderline-manic-stimulated-by-everything great. The only difference is Sunday was incredibly sunny and today, as I've already mentioned, is quite the opposite. The lack of sun actually has a calming effect on me. I don't feel so pressured to go go go. I can be a radical, revolutionary human and finally sit down. Sit down! That deserved an exclamation mark.

Aside from sitting down, I plan to spend today drastically simplifying my life. Or at least beginning the process. Where where where do I begin? I know I should know -- I've read the self-help books touting the benefits of simple living. I thought I had absorbed the information out of those books, but apparently not. I think I will begin with my clothes. I currently wear about 1% of the clothing I own, and that is in no way an exaggeration. You see, I had this habit in college of running down to Forever 21 at least once a week and buying some trendy outfit or some kind of obnoxious fedora. I mean, I had to have something quirky and cute to wear to Velour later that night, right? Oh, college. You were a time of one too many curious decisions.

So now I have a closet (several closets, in fact) full of ill-fitting, falling apart clothes, most of which haven't been worn since the late '70s. And then there were my many, many, many visits to Savers during the winter of 2007. Yes, 2007. That shit is all down in the basement. Needless to say, all of this unused stuff/junk is terribly overwhelming, unnecessary, and absolutely ready to be laid to rest/donated. Closet(s) and basement: Watch out, I'm coming for you.

Does it make any sense that I'm spending all of this time writing about how I am going to clean and simplify without actually, you know, cleaning and simplifying? It makes a little sense, sure. I have to get it out there and make it public so that I am almost forced to follow through with my plans. Hold me accountable, world.

This monkey (with wings) mind of mine will thank me. In fact, the flying monkey will most likely disappear once my physical environment becomes clutter-free and clean. The focused, calm mind steps in when placed in such an environment. Won't that be interesting?

And one day... ONE DAY I swear I will be the focused, calm, radical, revolutionary, witchy, guacamole-loving owner of a tiny home. You heard me. I'm all about jumping on the tiny house bandwagon. Maybe I'll even live in a bandwagon, so long as it's under 300 square feet. I don't even care if the bandwagon comes with a toilet. I'm all about peeing in nature. And on that note, let the tidying up begin.

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