Wednesday, December 23, 2015


I was going to blame the Universe for not wanting me to write, but did I ever stop to consider that the Universe is inside of me? Inside of a single atom? So the atoms that make up me do not want me to write. Why? Because they have put little obstacles in my way each time I sit down at this soulless computer. 1) My hands were suddenly and mysteriously sticky! Like I had eaten cotton candy in my sleep. (Just to make me more human, I want to let you know that it took me no less than four times to correctly spell "cotton." Yeah. No Mensa card in my future.) 2) There was a disgusting, disgusting, totally disgusting hairball on my chair. WHERE AND HOW DID IT GET THERE. No other explanation than my atoms put it there.

Funny that I think I can claim atoms as my own. They own me.

My blog is exhausting. I get it. But I am too unfocused and unmotivated to come up with some compelling theme for my blog other than "brain vomit." This is where I go to unload a bunch of uninteresting and ultimately unimportant thoughts that have been stewing around in this little head of mine. (Actually, quite a large head in more ways than one.) Observation: There have been a lot of "un" words in this paragraph. Unbelievable.

So here we go. A quick morning dump. You know, a dump of the mind. Sure, most humans take another kind of dump in the morning, but unfortunately I am not one of those people today.

I am currently reading A Tale of Two Cities mostly because I've always liked the title. I judge books on their titles, okay? Also, I've never read Dickens, so I thought, "Okay, I"ll give it a shot." I'm giving it a shot, but I'll tell ya -- he's just not really my style. It's too boring to explain why, so I won't.

My ex is dating a local celebrity! And that's totally cool and fine and everything, but what's REALLY totally cool and fine is that someone on his Facebook commented that it's nice he's finally dating someone smart. It was worded differently, but that's basically what he said. OH YEAH HEY THANKS SO MUCH and screw you. Screw you and the atoms that own you. My atoms and I may not be Mensa material, but we sure as heck are goshdamn smart. Like, so smart that I am so sad most of the time. Smart people are sad! Often!

I am not sad right now, though. Because I'm choosing not to be. Did you know you can choose? I realize it's super hard to choose sometimes, but it can be done. Hang in there! Winter solstice just passed, which means the days are getting longer! There will be more sun for your face and your heart and your toes and your soul. And the sun never went away in the first place. It's still up there in the Universe, the Universe inside of you. You've had the happiness of the sun inside you this whole time. Who knew?

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