Saturday, June 13, 2015


So this is growing up.

Just kidding. But it's no joke that today I am one day older. Whoops. I meant one year older. And I guess technically I'm also one day older as well. Technically. Technical. Tech savvy at 31.

So what has changed now that I am one year/day older? My favorite ice cream is now cherry cordial, which seems disgusting, I know, but it SO ISN'T. Who knew? The things you discover about yourself as you age.

I want, more than ever, to lead a minimalist lifestyle. Strip me of all my belongings, please! Take my clothes, leave me naked! Throw me inside a trendy tiny home, lock the door, swallow the key! I'll escape out the tiny window. I may need to butter myself up first in order to slide through.

I'm finally looking for a career. Creating resumes, cover letters, the whole damn soul sucking bit. But this time it doesn't feel soul sucking. It feels scary, sure, but also liberating. I'm growin' up and takin' charge! I want autonomy more than ever. I want to be able to pay for your meal.

I also maybe kinda sorta perhaps want to date you. Or at least give relationships a shot. Never have I ever cared to share my bed and head with another human (well, not NEVER, but certainly not often), but I'm beginning to think that might be kinda sorta perhaps... Nice. A relief. Somewhat necessary.

I love sitting on stoops now. I think I always have, though.

I feel more confident and comfortable in my skin. Not entirely. Heavens no. But far more than I have in the past. It just takes too much energy to care too much, so I don't. Gotta save all the energy I have for more important things anyway. And this old geezer has less energy than she did when she was a spring chicken. A spring turkey. A spring tofurkey. A spring block of cold, slimy tofu.

Okay, a parade is happening right now. AND ALL FOR MY 31st!!! I cannot concentrate with sirens, so I shall conclude with these words and then go inside to drink my 3rd can of Fresca: "It takes a long time to become young." Thanks, Picasso. I agree. I'm still getting there.

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