fifty-five facts

10 facts about my room
*there is a mysterious bloody mark on the door that i just noticed
*i have a special jewelry box on my floor full of special non-jewelry items
*it's crowded-n-cozy with books i'll never get around to reading
*i have a chicken mcnugget plastic toy on my shelf
*there are also doll heads on my shelf
*i have a couple of shelves dedicated to buddhist books
*my college degree is still in the envelope, placed on top of a shoe box on my floor
*there is tabasco sauce on my dresser (next to four cat paintings)
*i have three pieces of art by chris on my wall
*there are a million and a half used matches next to the tabasco sauce next to the four cat paintings

9 facts about my family
*we've got lots of snooty blood in us (we're french! we're german!)
*we had a dog for 14 (15? 16?) years named wolfgang that we still miss every single day
*instead of sitting around a table at dinner time, we sat around the tv watching the simpsons (which is totally awesome)
*i call my sister heather "sissy" and have my entire life; i doubt i'll ever call her heather
*speaking of names, i call my mom "mompsie" or "monny" and i tend to call my dad "johnny" (and i call myself a cab!)
*everyone in my family loves the holy hell out of books
*we are kinda sorta packrats (one word?) (two words?)
*we are assassins
*we're more of a rolling stones family as opposed to a beatles family

8 facts about my body
*i had jaundice when i was a babe
*it has stopped menstruating for months on two separate occasions
*it is a foreign land (at least to me) (but probably not to a few lucky souls)
*i have a birthmark on my upper left arm in the shape of hawaii
*i wake up with mysterious bruises and cuts often
*i have adorable moles on relatively racy parts of my body
*apparently i have a birthmark on my coochie, but i've never seen it (again, a foreign land!)
*it is chronically cold

7 facts about my childhood
*i had two cats that i named "bearded" and "graham cracker"
*i saved up five dollars when i was maybe 6-years-old so i could buy a teenage mutant ninja turtle
*my kindergarten teacher told me i didn't know how to skip
*i was in a shit ton of musicals
*i wrote, directed, and performed in a play about prom (i was maybe 9?)
*i never thought about getting married, a wedding, etc. i thought more about being famous.
*although i didn't think about marriage/wedded bliss, i was desperately in love with my best friend's brother for years

6 facts about my hometown
*apparently it used to be called "monkey town." i hope that's a racist reference.
*it holds a yearly festival called "strawberry days"
*oh, i guess it was actually called "battle creek," not "monkey town." why did i think it was called monkey town? what's in my pipe? not THAT pipe, pervs.
*there are no mormon chapels in town. psych. every other building is a chapel.
*it is home to the christa mcauliffe space education center! and purple turtle!
*there's a dumbass G on the mountain. let's claim mountains! nature is OURS! trademark it!

5 facts about my best friend(s)
*they are legit geniuses and in grad school right now
*laura and i lived in a purple room/womb together back in 2006. we even had bunkbeds.
*chris used to wear these salmon colored hospital scrubs all the time. in fact, i don't think he ever took them off. hey, chris! do you still wear those scrubs!
*laura was mistaken for a cabbage patch doll when she was a baby
*i believe we all graduated from college the same semester/year.

4 facts about my parents
*they went to yellowstone on their honeymoon
*their anniversary is on flag day
*they are extremely good looking (and youthful!) people
*they are assassins

3 facts about my personality
*i am a perpetual loner
*give me anything/anyone and i will overanalyze it/them
*i observe. i know everything about you.

2 facts about my favorite things
*the russians might be the best
*the older they get, the better they smell

1 fact about the person you like
*he is an assassin