I have been feeling waves of nausea for the past few days, so last night I said (in my head), "Screw you, stomach! I am going to bed at 9pm and you are going to heal yourself through sleep!" And I think it worked. Problem is, when you fall asleep at 9pm, you are wide awake at 4am. Actually, this is not a problem. I like it. This would be my schedule forever and ever if I had any kind of say in my life. But since I have absolutely no free will, this schedule is merely a rare occurrence. Here is a boring list of what I have done so far this early ass morning:
4:15am: Okay okay okay, I'm awake.
4:30am: Smoke reefer. JOKE. Get into car and drive to Maverick to buy eggs and Rockstars. Classy!
5:00am: Light some incense that smells like an old English grandmother and meditate. (I "cheated" during my meditation and totally closed my eyes, like, a million times! And I'm totally cool with it! Take that, Buddha!)
5:30am: Open up Rockstar, start drinking it, start tweeting, start blogging, start twitching. Oh yes, and start listening to sitar music! Amen! Amen, brother Buddha in heaven trippin' on acid with Jesus and the dinosaurs! Amen! Amen! Amen! Rockstar just kicked in!
6:00am: "6:00" looks cooler when you replace the zeroes with lowercase Os. Proof: 6:oo.
Right now: Breakfast? Hmmm. Tumblr? Yeah! Breakfast AND Tumblr? Good lord.