I am about to take you on a thrilling ride through the dark passages of my mind. And by "thrilling" I mean "rickety." And there won't really be any dark passages. I have those dark passages, sure. We all do! We are all weird humans with weird psychological issues! But today, right now, I feel pretty A-OK. I also have a massive amount of energy for some reason (I know the exact reason -- will explain later), so that is why you are about to get strapped in to this roller coaster of a post and take off on a ride full of loops and dips and abrupt stops that cause whiplash and what the hell am I even typing? I was lost from the very first sentence, as I imagine you were, too. Hey -- at least we're in this together, riding the same wavelength, the rickety wavelength found in this amusement park I like to call the universe...
Thanks for your patience! I promise to not waste your time anymore. Okay, I can't make that promise. But I can promise that about an hour ago I forced myself to eat before I let ED completely dictate the rest of my day. Eat without thinking about it too much. Just get some sustenance, girl. So I ate a white peach. A perfectly ripe and juicy white peach, a gift from the peach tree gods, a spiritual and slightly sexual experience in the form of a stone fruit. I have tasted the light, I have been saved, I am born again. In other words, holy shit that was a good peach. I ate the peach, I savored the peach, and then I ate a lot of nuts. And I swear my mood lifted immediately. Food is the healthy heroin, I suppose. I don't even have to inject the food. I get to taste it and discover different flavors and textures. AND most food is entirely legal! Food rules, drugs drool. (There will always be exceptions.)
So yeah. Remember to eat, Meg. I promise those daily things you find obnoxious or overwhelming will seem less so when you nourish yourself. It truly is that simple.
This hasn't been as thrilling or as rickety as I assumed. It was basically me just letting the world know I ate a peach. I do have other things on my mind, however, and here they are, quickly:
*Tolstoy rules. He really, really does. Or did. Does. Authors are immortal. His writing fills my soul with joy.
*I wish I had a job that required me to go to Wyoming for one week every month.
*Reminder to self: Take a shower, brush your teeth. It's 3:24 in the afternoon. These things should have been done by now. But that's okay! You still deserve love and respect!
*Maybe I'll cut my hair into a bob?
*Another reminder to myself (and everyone else): Be kinder. Respond more, react less.
*Start painting again, Meggie.
LOVE YOU. Go dive into a peach. You won't regret it ever ever ever.