I don't really like this phrase for many reasons, but I'm going to use it right now for one reason (laziness): I need to grow a pair of balls. Okay, first of all, no I don't because balls are ugly and highly sensitive; ovaries kick ass and SURPRISE I already have ovaries -- no need to grow a thing! Just a baby. But can I even have babies? Not with the way my body is right now! Those iron levels are quite the bitch. Bitches are great! Bitches have ovaries, which are so much cooler looking than the shriveled li'l brain-like balls. Huh. This is not where I intended to go in this post. What was I even saying? Something about growing a pair of balls? Oh right. I am a highly sensitive person (duuuuuuh) and it is beginning to interfere with all of my social interactions, even with my best friend. I feel like I am constantly annoying those closest to me, which terrifies me, so I shut down and stop asking for help. Uh oh! Can't do that, especially when I feel like I am physically dying right now. It's probably not a good thing that I am more terrified of being obnoxious than dying. And this is why I need to metaphorically grow a pair of balls! I need to reclaim my health. I need to own my words and actions. I need to eat a fucking burger.
That last sentence with the expletive was not the wisest choice. I fell into the trap of saying "just eat a damn sandwich," which is lazy and misses the point entirely. But seriously, I need to eat a fudging burger. A burger made from fudge? No way.
Maybe today I can do one teeny tiny little HUGE significant thing: Stop the critical self-talk. And order something meaty off of a menu.