Monday, December 28, 2009

experiment

It's the end of a decade, but it's the beginning of an experiment.

Today I took my Wellbutrin for the first time in months.

I don't know exactly why I went off of it in the first place. I have always been careless with my medication, unfortunately. I take it sporadically and then will suddenly decide that I don't want to take it all, so I quit cold tofurkey. The side effects, I believe, of quitting cold gobble gobble are worse than any side effects while taking it. So why the inconsistency? Again... I don't know.

Lately I have been a bit on the manic depressive side. The sudden mood swings scare me and cause me to do and say things that I deeply regret. Thinking about all of this, I decided to conduct an experiment. I took my Wellbutrin this morning and will continue to take it to see if I notice a positive change in my mood and behavior. If so, great. I will then continue to take it consistently. If not, that's okay. I will then go off of it gradually and not cold fowl.

How do I feel today? Well, I honestly feel great. Much more stable. This could very well be a placebo effect because I don't think I could feel the Wellbutrin in just one day, but... Maybe? Whatever it is that is causing my improved mood and outlook, I like it and it has been a much needed relief.

Next experiment: What will happen if I eat a steak during an Animal Alliance Club coffee night?

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