Monday, September 19, 2016

constant

Hi everyone! I've wanted to write for the past few days, but I stop before I even start because I hold myself to such impossible standards. Lower your standards, Meg! Lower your standards and up the iron in your diet. Lower the stress and up the, uh, fun? Yeah. Fun. Lower your eyes and up your chances of not slipping on a banana peel. I could continue with this lower/up thing all day, but I won't. I won't because I have some strawberries that need washing and nails that need filing and trees that need hugging. In other words, I'm too busy to entertain obsessions.

I am not sure I have anything new to say today. I suppose I always have something new to say -- we all do -- but it takes too much self-reflection and careful thought to come up with these new things. So that leaves me with... old things? Old things to talk about? Old isn't the right word. The more appropriate word would be constant. Constant things. They are the things (and people) (and places) (and probably poor ideas) that occupy most of the space in my wonderful, weary head. The constants are: food, my life's purpose, food, the eternal search for my origins, breakfast/lunch/dinner/snacks/food, books, Buddhism, burritos and/or virtually anything edible.

See. Nothing new. I've written it all before. What a chore. A chore to read, a chore to write, I joke IT'S NOT A CHORE. It just rhymed. I'm not a fan of rhymes, though. I dunno. They just seem kinda cheesy and forced. Mmmm. Cheesy. Mmmm. Forced cheese. Mmmmaybe I should go eat.

Eating has been rewarding yet challenging lately, I must admit. That's to be expected, but that doesn't make it any easier. Still, I have to eat in order to think, and, funny enough, in order to survive. So I think I'll keep it up. I have to learn how to stop fixating on food, though. The interest in and excitement for food and cooking is very welcomed, but I also want to learn how to simply make and eat a meal and then move on to other things. I guess I need a job/hobby/spouse/family/dog/cat/crossword puzzle. I guess I just need to be open.

This isn't complete. I had more to say, more to write, more to reveal. But I am tired and I want to eat a salad and I want to publish this now so that later I will feel like I accomplished something today. Okay! Okay.

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