Monday, August 31, 2015


I don't know why I want to begin each post with an overly enthusiastic "GREETINGS!" but I do. Do I? I don't think I really do when it comes down to it. I'm figuring out that I don't have anything figured out. I don't know a lot of stuff when it comes down to it. Hello, greetings, good afternoon, Meghan. Nice to meet you. Now tell me... Who are you? I've got time. I'll listen.

I am in my new place. It is my first full day here and, thankfully, things don't seem as overwhelming as they did yesterday. Things do seem rather dark, however, but just in a literal sense. I guess basement apartments are naturally lacking in natural light, huh? Bummer. It's alright, it's okay, it's groovy because I will just have to get my incredibly firm ass down to IKEA and purchase some incredibly firm (?) light fixtures. Plus, I'm usually not home during the day, so shrug shoulders. (I like that I don't even try to explain my emotions anymore, I just let emojis and emoticons do the talking. And if I am too lazy to go find the appropriate emojis and emoticons on the Internet, I simply type out the emoji/emoticon action. Shrug shoulders. Dance the cha cha. Replace your eyeballs with hearts. Corn on the cob. And so forth.)

So I will have to get used to darkness, which is cool because it's almost Halloween (uhhh... in two months) and I am totally on board with the black lipstick trend. There are other little worries and sighs about this apartment, but I am determined -- DETERMINED, DAMMIT -- to make this my home, to make it clean and comfortable and, yes, even a creative space for creative souls to wander in and create/eat my hummus. (Don't touch my hummus.)

I miss writing. So I am writing. But I also miss being outside. So I will end this soon and venture outside to walk and read and discover and get lost and open up google maps and get frustrated at myself that I am 31 and still cannot read a map and then text my mom about how I am lost and then worry that I worried her and so I will text her back and say that I am not lost! but I will still be lost and then I will call (quicker than texting, calling comes in handy on those very rare occasions) my sister and tell her I am a "bit lost" and that she shouldn't even bother to say north or east or south or west and speaking of west, did she hear that Kanye is running for prez in 2020? And why is my right eye so blurry these days? 20/20 vision would be a miracle, but so would winning the lottery and building a glass box out in the desert where I will live and ride camels and rub sand on my heels to heal the rough skin, the rough sole, the rough soul. Where was I? I seem to have drifted off into a no-man's land, which would be glorious. No men! Just women! Just women and camels and President North West. If I have to sleep in order to have this dream, consider me zzzzz.

Okay. Walk time. And then I'll finish cleaning, I swear, I swear. Damn! Shit! Nipple!

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