Friday, February 8, 2013

just a cat president

I wish certain things didn't exist, like creationism, child labor, children (sometimes), Kolob, and ex-boyfriends.

I am really happy certain things exist, such as antimatter, penny arcades, pen pals, and the Oregon Trail.

I am looking forward to Presidents' Day because I am a huge fan of Garfield (the cat, not the prez) and Garfield (the prez, not the cat) would have been a huge fan of Garfield (the hockey team, not the cat), had he only made it through the storm of '97 alive (he died in a time warp).

No, but the truth of the (anti)matter is is that is is reminds me of "iris" and just once in my goddamn existence I would live someone to tell me that my nose reminds them of an iris.

Confession Friday: I had some "special tea" and am reading the Wikipedia page on antimatter and am listening to "Dark Ambient Space Music: Through The Ergosphere" and I have ice cream waiting for me in the freezer... But no pan of lasagna! Garfield's gonna be pissed.

Don't be pissed, Garfunkel. Just be the postal service. The band, not the president.

I need to escape and be a Parisian cliche.

Garfield (my ex, not the antihydrogen atom) just wants a fence. I want the bottom of the ocean.

Here's what introverts do on Friday nights: They listen to "Dark Ambient Space Music" alone in their room while reading about antimatter and wondering why they just stared at a blank ceiling for eleven straight minutes.

Does "blank ceiling" make sense? Sorta. Does particle physics make sense? No and TOTALLY.

Keep it up. And keep it down. And keep on trekking through that time warp... Don't end up pulling a Garfield.

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